It feels like it’s become fashionable to talk about how bad 2016 was. Like “OMG 2016 was the WORST!” and then talk for a good 30 minutes about how bad politics were, how much we hate Trump, and how all our favorite celebrities died. Pretty sure I just summed up every Buzzfeed article for the past 3 weeks. I really don’t want to jump on that bandwagon… but my 2016 really was the worst. Between deaths and heartbreak and depression and anger and hurt and shattered dreams… it’s been the worst year of my life.
There is no difference really between December 31 and January 1. I did not wake up a completely different person who had pushed the crap heap that was 2016 behind her, ready to greet the new year with a smile. Mostly I greeted the new year with a scowl and snapped “Where’s the coffee?” But after I had fueled up and gotten rid of my champagne headache, I began to think about what I want to do this year, who I want to be this year, things I need to change this year. For the past month or so I’ve been telling myself that in 2017 I am going to invest in myself more, which is fine and good, but what would that entail?
So here is my plan, my resolution to invest in myself:
Physically – I’ve been working on becoming healthier this past year, and know I need to keep it up in 2017. I’m no spring chicken and am starting to face adult issues like body aches, wrinkles, heartburn, etc. I’m realizing that certain things run in my family and I need to be more aware/take better care of my body. This past year I’ve lost 20 pounds and a few inches, which is fabulous, but this year I want to work harder and lose more weight.
Financially – Retirement is only 31 years away and I have ZERO money saved. Granted, this is the first time in my life I’ve actually had the financial means to start saving for retirement, so this year I want to set up a retirement fund and start putting away something. I spend money like crazy on junk I don’t need. I imagine Future Candice is gonna be pissed off if she has to work when she’s 76 because Present Candice decided she needed a new purse!
Mentally – Because of all the stuff that happened this past year I found myself in a not so good place mentally. I went to a therapist for a little while (which totally helped some), wrote all my feelings in a journal, and finally got back on my meds. So now I’m in a better place, but not in a GREAT place. This year I want to work on moving past 2016. I want to work on letting go of anger and hatred, letting go of the hurt that is holding me back, and get to a place where I am healthier mentally.
Socially – Last year I went through this “I must be more involved in things!” panic. It truly brought me to tears trying to figure out what I needed to do to do more things, to meet new people, and to broaden myself. Then I got back on my meds and remembered OMG DOING MORE THINGS SUCKSSSS!!!! My goal this year isn’t to join a million different groups and meet all the new people, but rather be more social within the groups I already belong to and to get more involved in areas that I’m already involved in. So far I’ve already signed up for a church small group, which I’m totally excited about!
Religiously – I’m the type of person who, when faced with complete disaster, goes straight to God. This past year I became very diligent in Bible reading, praying, reading Christian books, going to church, etc. It all truly helped me sort out my stuff, but once I started feeling better I started to do those things less and less til finally not at all. I know there isn’t one way to be a good Christian, but this year I want to find a way for ME to be a good Christian rather than feel guilty because I’m not acting certain ways/doing certain things. Because goodness knows I’m feeling crazy guilty right now for not reading my Bible an hour a day and memorizing Bible verses…
Friendshiply – Adult friendships are super hard. Period. This year I moved away from friendships that I needed and moved towards ones that I didn’t need. I’ve started to work on fixing those friendships, so that’s good, but this year I want to work on becoming a better friend and forming deeper relationships. I’m bad about thinking someone is a best or good friend when really we’re not THAT close. It eventually leads to me being hurt and feeling bitter towards someone. I also want to start staying in better contact with people, checking on them when they have issues going on or asking about situations.
Romantically – Blah blah blah. This year I want to NOT CARE SO MUCH about finding someone.
Bloggishly – Hello blog… I’ve missed you!
While 2017, so far, hasn’t felt much different from 2016, I am NOT ready to jump on the “OMG 2017 already sucks!” bandwagon. (Seriously, I’ve already seen things about this. It’s January 4. WTF is wrong with these people?) New years are shiny and new and full of possibility and hope. I’m truly more excited for this year than I have been in a long time and believe that it will be a good year. Happy New Year friends!