I had a recent conversation with a blogger friend of mine that inspired me to write this post. Essentially, the conversation was about how she comments on a few blogs a good bit and never once has the bloggers behind those blogs responded back. She knew those bloggers would be at an author event she was attending, but she didn’t feel like she could say “Hi” to them because they never responded to any of her comments.
We continued to converse about how some bloggers, it seems, are very cliquish. They’ve got their little groups that constantly chat with on Twitter, support each others’ blogs, etc. and for those of us NOT in those groups, it can sometimes feel very intimidating trying to chat with them.
My contribution to the conversation was that if I don’t get responses to comments, tweets, etc. on a regular basis, I usually lose interest. Not that they aren’t interesting… I just don’t see the need to go out of my way to talk to someone who doesn’t want to talk to me. Maybe I’m just super enlightened… hm… <ponders>
No, I’m really not.
One thing I absolutely HATE in books is when the MC explains all of the cliques in school. You know that scene in any teen high school movie where the new kid is learning where everyone sits in the cafeteria? Yeah, that scene. I can’t stand them. Mostly because I don’t believe they’re really true. I think back to my own high school days and the cafeteria and yes… like sat with like, but it wasn’t specific. I mean, sometimes band kids sat with the athletes and the cheerleaders sat with the theater kids… I never thought “Oh, I am in this caste. I cannot talk to any other groups in school because I am beneath them.” I had friends of all types: athletes, cheerleaders, band kids (well, I was in band), theater kids (and theater), smart kids (ditto), newspaper kids… er… that’s about all we had, but still.
So that’s how I view blogging. I don’t feel like I’m in a specific “clique” and that I can’t talk to some bloggers or get nervous talking to them because I’m not part of their group. There are a few that I tried to talk to, thinking they were really cool, and got no response. I’ll admit, it did make me feel a little blah and that like I wasn’t cool enough to chat with them…
My discussion is basically this: what do we think about blogger cliques? Are they good or bad?
Sometimes, I think they can be good. It’s nice having this little group that totally supports you and your blog. You find stuff in common and bond over that. It’s a great feeling knowing that there are others who love the same things you do and will gush and fangirl right alongside you.
But then other times, I think these cliques can go all Heathers (minus the psycho parts) and make other bloggers feel intimidated or uncool. I know it’s not on purpose, but still… it happens.
My solution for myself whenever I’m starting to feel uncool around other bloggers is to remind myself that this ISN’T high school. There are tons of others in our community that I do fit in with. Maybe I don’t fit in with the “OMG DRAGONS!” clique or the “CONTEMPORARY FOREVER!!!” clique… and that’s okay. Maybe they don’t fit in in the cliques I might be a part of – although I try not to think of myself as cliquish!
For me, I try to be open to everyone. If you want to talk to me, rock on! If you don’t, well hey… that person over there does! Going back to the conversation that sparked this discussion post, during it one of my friends made the comment about how another blogger emailed her and then freaked out with excitement when she responded. Like this person was so intimidated by emailing my friend and was shocked when she got a response. My friend was genuinely surprised by this reaction.
While I hope people are intimidated by me (no, I really don’t!), if you ever email me and get excited because I responded, it really will make my day. 😉
So now for your thoughts: What do you think about blogger cliques? Do they exist or are we just imagining them? Do you ever feel intimidated by other bloggers and trying to chat with them?
*Update: Friend who was nervous about meeting another blogger DID meet her and the other blogger turned out to be super sweet! So yay!